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FEBRUARY / MARCH 2022 • IDAHO SENIOR INDEPENDENT
Not enough candidates? Adjust your
search parameters, providing you’ve already
spent time determining what your bound-
aries are and what you’re going to do if he/
she/they respond.
THE DOWNSIDE
If someone does respond, you have a
whole new set of challenges: Text? Email?
Call? Meet? If so, when, where, and how?
While those are questions for another arti-
cle. In the meantime, know that dating
takes time, effort, and a willingness to put
yourself out there.
And it comes with some risks.
TIPS
First, you need to create a profile. That
means at least one photo, answering some
questions about your background and what
you’re looking for.
Profiles that get noticed, according
to experts, include good, current photos.
Smiling photos do best, while action photos
convey vitality.
A graphic designer in her 50s, Kate
T. won’t respond to any profiles without
photos and looks for those that show faces
clearly, especially the eyes. Photos that
emphasize flesh or physique are out, too.
“It’s not an area where I want to be
overly judged,” she says.
Writing about yourself can be challenging.
Focus on your attributes, but don’t brag or
exaggerate, advises a recent study. While
looks are important, trust is more important.
Be both personable and positive—avoid
bashing the ex or conveying a “hot-pants” vibe.
Be specific about your interests, but con-
sider seeking out qualities you’re looking
for rather than a list of physical attributes
from others.
Finally, spell and grammar check every-
thing. Twice.
THINGS TO REMEMBER
It’s your profile, so you can and should
check it and update it as you find new and
better ways to articulate what you think you
bring to the table and what you’re looking for.
Understand that sharing any information
in such an open forum is not without risk.
According to Kaspersky, an interna-
tional cybersecurity firm, 55 percent of
33 *Fictional work about a pick-up artist?
38 Requiem Mass word
39 Layers
40 There are lots of them
44 Beats by __
45 Some tags
48 Afternoon refresher
49 *Illustrated work for bullpen pitchers?
52 Tries to influence, with “with”
54 Worship
55 Paperback designed to simulate animation
... and a hint to the answers to starred clues
57 Tried and true
58 Choice
59 Parrot
60 Unbending
61 Written reminder
62 “The Spanish Tragedy” dramatist
63 Strong point
users have experienced some kind of issue
with online dating.
Some issues are germane to all social
media usage, like receiving dubious emails,
data leaks from the vendor site, and being
unable to completely erase your profile.
Most potential issues revolve around
things users can control, like someone taking
advantage of overshared information.
Kaspersky advises users to employ good
computer protocols, like strong passwords
you change often, not using the same photos
as those on your social media, limiting shar-
ing, and not responding to unsolicited emails.
Some issues with online dating, how-
ever, are beyond your control, like being
recognized by someone whom you’d rather
not have noticed, or a disingenuous person
whose age, height, and gender don’t match
their profile, and of course, being rejected.
Organized matchmaking is not new, and
for some cultural groups, it is the norm. Nor
are matchmaking services, as Jane Austen
fans can attest. But in the 1940s, they turned
to data to determine whom you should date.
In 1965, for example, more than one million
subscribers signed onto the first internet based
site, Operation Match, according to a 2013 PBS
broadcast, xoxosms. The show also reported
that meeting your mate through mutual friends
is still the most preferred method.
In 2004, four Harvard students launched
the forerunner to OKCupid, which currently
boasts almost 10 percent of the market share
and is one of the most popular dating apps.
The most popular app is Grindr, which
gears towards the LBGTQ community,
followed by MeetMe, which caters to
the after-40 set, but its social discovery
approach seems more likely to appeal to a
younger crowd.
Next is Match.com, PlentyofFish, Hinge,
OKCupid, and Tinder, all five of which are
owned by the company Match Group, Inc..
The company reports revenues in excess of
$2 billion.
So much for free love.
The numbers suggest dating apps
are firmly embedded in the landscape
of love. Fifty-five years ago, Operation
Match accounted for roughly one in every
200 Americans. Today, about one in 13
DOWN
1 Cat, say
2 “Yowza!”
3 It can be grand
4 Darkroom gear
5 Skeptical, as a view
6 Weighed down
7 Group that blends well
8 Tries to unearth
9 Major work
10 Formal wear
11 Mil. roadside hazard
12 Sweater material source
13 Shades of blue
18 River to the Colorado
20 Noodles
22 Barcelona-born surrealist
24 Cruciverbalist Reagle of “Wordplay”
25 Words of praise
29 Guns
30 What many writers work on
SPOTLIGHTS PAGE 13
Americans, more than 30 million people,
use dating apps.
The pandemic has certainly changed the
dating landscape as well. OKCupid recorded
a 700 percent increase recently, as well as an
increase in users interested in longterm and
committed relationships, versus a decline in
those looking for something casual.
GETTING STARTED
Get online and look around. Most sites
allow you to browse at least a little for
free, while some sites, like SilverSingles.
com or eHarmony, ask for the equivalent
of a Meyers-Briggs personality test before
letting you take a peek.
To figure out which sites are out there,
try portals like weeklydatinginsider.com
or consumer-rankings.com. Better yet, ask
around. Statistics suggest someone you
know has already used a dating site.
As for your profile, to get a sense of what
works, newbies might want to search for
appealing profiles and emulate that approach.
Ask a trusted friend or family member to
review your profile before posting. The writer
of this article has reviewed numerous profiles
for exes and guy friends alike.
Dating is an investment of time and
money. Most sites charge a subscription fee
for one month up to several months. Turn
off the automatic renewal feature, so you’re
in control of your investment.
As for time, you’re in control of your
profile and your experience. Use it when you
want to, and respond to whom you want.
Turn off your profile for a bit when you need
a break, or if you’ve met someone you like.
Finally, know that dating apps are
simply a way to put you in a target-rich
environment. The only way to ensure you
will not meet anyone is to stay physically
and virtually isolated. Dating apps open the
door to opportunities. Nothing ventured,
nothing gained.
“If you’re serious about not wanting to
be alone the rest of your life, you gotta take
the plunge and be persistent,” says Ted,
who still dates the lady he met online more
than a year ago.
“Don’t be afraid to fail,” he advises.
“You don’t fail, you just move forward.” ISI
31 Be in a cast
33 Specialty
34 Rin Tin Tin autograph, e.g.
35 Leather sources
36 Soft ball material
37 Mine vehicles
38 Keeper’s concern
41 Spirited horse
42 Saturate again
43 “Hang on __”: 1965 #1 hit
45 Apple video-editing app
46 Run
47 Chanel product
50 Signed
51 Dinnertime draws
53 Duel tool
55 __ club
56 WC
57 Smokey Bear TV spot, for one
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